There must still be a few of you left out there.
How do you manage to survive? To navigate life?
I mean, you people without a computer or electronic communications device.
How, for instance, do you know what’s going on in the outside world?
More and more, newscasts consist of referrals to the TV station’s website. I imagine that will continue until the evening news will be something like this:
“Mayor Rahm Emanuel made a stunning announcement today. For more on this story, you can visit our website at badnews@comdotcom.”
“And turning to international news, go to our website at badnews@comdotcom.”
“The Federal Department of Plagues and Pustules has issued a warning that just might save your life. To learn more, visit our website…”
“Now let’s get the full weather forecast. And for that we turn to our website…”
“There was some surprising news in that tight pennant race. And to find out more, visit our website…’
“And finally tonight, what do jumper cables, a kitten, exact change and King Tut have in common? Find out at our website…’
And that’s the news for tonight.
Don’t worry, though, when all this comes to pass you still will be able to get your news from newspapers. They will, by then, be more ecologically friendly. They will consist of just one page with these words on it: “Holy Toledo! To find out more, visit our website at email@example.com.”
Books also may undergo a similar metamorphosis. Just one page that states: “Anna Karenina — Even the snows of Siberia could not quench her passion. Visit our website at firstname.lastname@example.org.”
And me? I hope to be around — “Sassone: What chair could hold him?
Visit our website…”